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Adulthood Cross Stitch Pattern
Adulthood cross stitch pattern
Adulthood Cross Stitch Pattern

Remember when you were a little kid and you wanted to grow up SO BAD…. yeah, that turned out well for most of us…😂😂 In case you’re finding adulting harder than your eight-year-old self anticipated, the Adulthood cross stitch pattern should help you giggle at the absurdity of how we all got what we wished for (and then some). This pretty pattern uses only full cross stitches, so even if you are stitching and relaxing with a drink in your hand, you won’t have any pesky backstitch or complicated stitches screwing up your vibe. This pattern can also be customized to change out the word “booze” for anything that fits your lifestyle.

This pattern is also available in the full Adulting 101 Collection set. 

 

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Adulting all over cross stitch pattern
Adulting all over cross stitch pattern
Adulting All Over Cross Stitch Pattern

Do you amaze yourself some days with the fact that you made it through the day and coped with all sorts of adult stuff and didn’t have a meltdown?

 

 

If you’re all like Christina Aguilera going “yasss queen” in your head, then the Adulting All Over cross stitch pattern should definitely take up residence in a place of pride in your home (or office if you really want to “impress” your coworkers with your life skills). It’s also a fun reminder that you CAN cope with all the shenanigans life throws at you, even on days when you want to throw in the towel and wallow in copious amounts of chocolate and popcorn on your couch all day.

This pattern is also available in the full Adulting 101 Collection set. 

 

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Another Great Day cross stitch pattern
Another Great Day cross stitch pattern
Another Great Day Cross Stitch Pattern

Put your hand up in the air if this thought has ever crossed your mind … (**waves hand furiously**)… 😂 When adulting just seems too hard for you, take some time out to relax with a little stitching and whip up the pretty demotivational Another Great Day cross stitch pattern. Whether it’s your kid tugging at your pant leg to come clean up the horrific disaster he just made in the kitchen, or your boss playing the “oh one more quick thing” trick while piling on three days of extra work, don’t let the responsibilities in your life get you down. Get comfy and stab out those frustrations with this cross stitch pattern, one stitch at a time.

This pattern is also available in the full Adulting 101 Collection set. 

 

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Are You Feeling Festive cross stitch pattern
Are You Feeling Festive cross stitch pattern
Are You Feeling Festive Cross Stitch Pattern

Are you feeling festive, punk? Are ya? Channel your inner Dirty Harry and get into the spirit of the season with this sassy cross stitch pattern.

 

If you’re feeling super “cheery” this season, the entire set of Merry Snarkmas cross stitch patterns can be purchased for a 25% discount from the individual pattern prices. 

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Astrology Xstitch Magazine cross stitch pattern
Astrology Xstitch Magazine cross stitch pattern
Astrology Cross Stitch Pattern

Whether astrology is your thing or not, this humorous cross stitch pattern is sure to generate laughs. With vivid blues and purples and sparkling metallics for a little extra glam, Astrology is a really fun pattern to stitch up for yourself or as a gift. The twelve zodiac signs are stitched in gold metallic floss around the perimeter of the design, framing the cheeky quote. This pattern was featured in Issue 3 of XStitch Magazine in the Space issue. If you can’t have a crystal ball to predict your future behaviour, you might want to use this pattern to excuse whatever “mischief” you get into….

 

As seen in XStitch Mag

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Awa an Bile cross stitch pattern hoop
Awa an Bile cross stitch pattern no text
Awa an Bile Cross Stitch Pattern

When you’re having one of “those” days, maybe a pretty bouquet of flowers is what you need… 😂 The lovely Jacobean-era inspired Awa an Bile cross stitch pattern features brilliant Japan Threads in both gold and copper, as well as pretty gold beads. The text “Awa an bile yer heid” is Scottish Doric, and translates to “Go away and boil your head”, aka “get lost.” If the text isn’t to your taste, you can purchase the custom pattern option and choose a word of your choice to be drafted into the pattern (as shown in the mockup image with the word “Peace”). Or, you could stitch the pattern without the text, there’s an example photograph showing what it looks like without text. And if you’re not sure what Japan Threads are, you can check out this free video tutorial. 😊

This design is also available as a downloadable cellphone wallpaper, printable gift tags, and printable art. They can be purchased individually or as a set, or the Mega Bundle with all downloadable products and all the Cheeky Wee Lass cross stitch patterns is also available. Just the Cheeky Wee Lass cross stitch patterns are also available as a set.

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Awa an Raffle cross stitch pattern hoop
Awa an Raffle Yersel cross stitch pattern no text
Awa an Raffle Yersel Cross Stitch Pattern

Feel like you really want to tell someone how you feel, but want to do it in a subtle, elegant way? The Awa an Raffle Yersel cross stitch pattern might be the perfect fit for your needs. This pattern features luscious Jacobean-era inspired flowers and pomegranates, as well as stunning Japan Threads and gold beading. The text, “Awa an raffle yersel”, is a Scottish insult translating to a milder form of “piss off”… 😂 Of course, you’re free to come up with your own translation for those who may be “sensitive” to the real meaning, such as “Entertain yourself.” If the text isn’t to your taste, you can purchase the custom pattern option and choose a word of your choice to be drafted into the pattern (as shown in the mockup image with the word “Bloom”). Or, you could stitch the pattern without the text, there’s an example photograph showing what it looks like without text. And if you’re not sure what Japan Threads are, you can check out this free video tutorial. 😊

This design is also available as a downloadable cellphone wallpaper, printable gift tags, and printable art. They can be purchased individually or as a set, or the Mega Bundle with all downloadable products and all the Cheeky Wee Lass cross stitch patterns is also available. Just the Cheeky Wee Lass cross stitch patterns are also available as a set.

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Bassa cross stitch pattern hoop
Bassa cross stitch pattern no text
Bassa Cross Stitch Pattern

If you’ve ever wanted to be a little “subtle” in how you’re feeling, the Bassa cross stitch pattern might just be for you. These Jacobean-era inspired flowers feature gorgeous vibrant colours and shining Japan Threads and beads. This pretty pattern bears the Scottish word “bassa” which translates to “bastard.” If the text isn’t to your taste, you can purchase the custom pattern option and choose a word of your choice to be drafted into the pattern (as shown in the mockup image with the word “Dare”). Or, you could stitch the pattern without the text, there’s an example photograph showing what it looks like without text. And if you’re not sure what Japan Threads are, you can check out this free video tutorial. 😊

This design is also available as a downloadable cellphone wallpaper, printable gift tags, and printable art. They can be purchased individually or as a set, or the Mega Bundle with all downloadable products and all the Cheeky Wee Lass cross stitch patterns is also available. Just the Cheeky Wee Lass cross stitch patterns are also available as a set.

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Be the Villain cross stitch pattern
Be the Villain cross stitch pattern
Be the Villain Cross Stitch Pattern

Feel like getting a little stabby? Maybe the “Be The Villain” cross stitch pattern can help you out… 😂 When people ask me what I do, I often say, “I help people relax by stabbing something 20,000 times.” This dark humour reminded me of many villains, and I was inspired by the cool elegance of Bond villains in particular. Featured in Issue 5 of XStitch Magazine, “Be the Villain” represents how our outer well-groomed appearance can mask our darker side.

As seen in XStitch Mag

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Caffeine cross stitch pattern
Caffeine cross stitch pattern
Caffeine Cross Stitch Pattern

Are you someone who cannot fathom starting their day without the Elixir of the Gods, caffeine? If your morning cuppa is more important to you than making sure your first born has both shoes on before he leaves for school, the Caffeine cross stitch pattern will make the perfect “statement” in your home. It will also ensure that those who try to get between you and your fifth cup of the day reconsider their life decisions…. 😂 This pattern is also perfect for the office, and also comes with the option of substituting the word caffeine with “wine.” You know, just in case a fruit-based beverage is more your jam…😉

This pattern is also available in the full Adulting 101 Collection set. 

 

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Cheeky Wee Lass cellphone wallpaper set
Awa an bile cellphone wallpaper
Cheeky Wee Lass Cellphone Wallpapers

Who doesn’t love a fun and pretty cellphone wallpaper? Keep the sass from the Cheeky Wee Lass collection going with these pretty downloadable cellphone wallpapers! Each design comes with two wallpapers (one with the sassy quote, and one without). These wallpapers are created from original watercolour and ink illustrations by Dana Batho, and are inspired by the cross stitch patterns in the Cheeky Wee Lass collection (click for more details and to see translations of the cheeky Scottish insults) — Awa an Bile, Awa an Raffle Yersel, Bassa, Gypit Hoor, Pooch Me HameYer Arse and Parsley, and Yiv a Face. See the details tab for more information about the specifications and format of the wallpapers. The full set of wallpapers can be purchased as a set of all seven designs for 25% off the retail price of each design individually.

These illustrations are also available as printable gift tags and printable art. They can be purchased individually or as a set, or the Mega Bundle with all downloadable products and all the Cheeky Wee Lass cross stitch patterns is also available. Just the Cheeky Wee Lass cross stitch patterns are also available as a set.

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Cheeky Wee Lass Collection Mega Bundle
Awa an Bile cross stitch pattern hoop
Cheeky Wee Lass Collection Mega Bundle

If you must have ALL. THE. THINGS, then this bundle is for you! This bundle includes everything in the Cheeky Wee Lass collection: the seven cross stitch patterns (Awa an Bile, Awa an Raffle Yersel, Bassa, Gypit Hoor, Pooch Me HameYer Arse and Parsley, and Yiv a Face), the seven designs of gift tags, fourteen cellphone wallpapers (each of the seven designs with and without a quote), and seven printable art PDFs. How cool is that? That’s 35 items in one set, and the set is priced at more than 30% off the price of buying all the items individually (all the items would be over US $150 total if bought individually). It’s also less than purchasing all the bundled sets of each item together. Please see the “Bundle details” tab for more information. 😊

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Cheeky Wee Lass Cross Stitch Pattern Set
Awa an Bile cross stitch pattern hoop
Cheeky Wee Lass Cross Stitch Pattern Set

Can’t decide which of the stunningly elegant Cheeky Wee Lass cross stitch patterns you love more? Don’t decide, you can purchase all seven patterns in this gloriously cheeky set! All seven patterns feature gloriously shimmering Japan Threads as well as sparkling beads, which enhance the luscious Jacobean-era inspired botanical designs. The set of all seven designs is 25% off the retail price of buying each design individually. The patterns included are Bassa, Awa an Bile, Pooch Me Hame, Awa an Raffle Yersel, Yer Arse and Parsley, Gypit Hoor, and Yiv a Face. If the text isn’t to your taste for any of the patterns, you can purchase the custom pattern option and choose a word of your choice to be drafted into that pattern. Or, you could stitch the patterns without the text, there’s an example photograph showing what each looks like without text. You can also check out each pattern listing to see more images of each design. Not sure what Japan Threads are? Check out this free video tutorial. 😊

These designs are also available as downloadable cellphone wallpapers, printable gift tags, and printable art. They can be purchased individually or as a set, or the Mega Bundle with all downloadable products and all the Cheeky Wee Lass cross stitch patterns is also available.

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Cheeky Wee Lass printable art set
Awa an bile printable art 8x10 framed
Cheeky Wee Lass Printable Art

Do you ever feel like you have so many stitching WIPs you just can’t keep up? Or maybe you love your pattern so much, you’d like another variation on it for the office (without having to stitch it again). The Cheeky Wee Lass collection of printable art is here to save the day! These pretty art printables are original watercolour and ink illustrations by Dana Batho, and are inspired by the cross stitch patterns in the Cheeky Wee Lass collection (click for more details and for translations of the quotes in each design) — Awa an Bile, Awa an Raffle Yersel, Bassa, Gypit Hoor, Pooch Me HameYer Arse and Parsley, and Yiv a Face. See the details tab for more information about the specifications and format of the printable art. The full set of art be purchased as a set of all seven designs for 25% off the retail price of each design individually.

These illustrations are also available as downloadable cellphone wallpapers and gift tags. They can be purchased individually or as a set, or the Mega Bundle with all downloadable products and all the Cheeky Wee Lass cross stitch patterns is also available. Just the Cheeky Wee Lass cross stitch patterns are also available as a set.

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Cheeky Wee Lass gift tag set
Awa an bile gift tag
Cheeky Wee Lass Printable Gift Tags

Want to make your gift giving more colourful this year? Jazz up your presents (and distract the recipient if you’re only giving them a gift as a social obligation 😉) with these pretty printable gift tags! There are ten on each sheet per design, and each tag has a slight variation in the placement of the pattern.

These gift tags are created from original watercolour and ink illustrations by Dana Batho, and are inspired by the cross stitch patterns in the Cheeky Wee Lass collection (click for more details) — Awa an Bile, Awa an Raffle Yersel, Bassa, Gypit Hoor, Pooch Me HameYer Arse and Parsley, and Yiv a Face. See the details tab for more information about the specifications and format of the gift tags. The full set of gift tags can be purchased as a set of all seven designs for 25% off the retail price of each design individually.

These illustrations are also available as downloadable cellphone wallpapers and printable art. They can be purchased individually or as a set, or the Mega Bundle with all downloadable products and all the Cheeky Wee Lass cross stitch patterns is also available. Just the Cheeky Wee Lass cross stitch patterns are also available as a set.

not rated $2.99$15.99
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Cold Rock mermaid cross stitch pattern
Cold Rock cross stitch pattern
Cold Rock Cross Stitch Pattern

Have you ever been sitting in a chair for so long that you get really sore? Imagine how a mermaid feels, sitting on a hard cold rock for hours on end, waiting to lure any nearby sailors…. The first of the Mermaid Tales cross stitch pattern set, this cheeky cross stitch pattern sums up the daily grind of a mermaid with sparkle and glitter. If the text isn’t to your taste (or you have little ones at home who can read), there is also a PG version included in the pattern. Release your inner siren with this sassy Cold Rock cross stitch pattern.

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Dashing Through the Hell No cross stitch pattern
Dashing Through the Hell No cross stitch pattern
Dashing Through the Hell No Cross Stitch Pattern

Dashing through the what?! Oh hell, no. If you go dashing through anything it’ll be the airport on the way to a tropical destination, right?! Bring your “love” of a winter wonderland to life with the Dashing Through the Hell No cross stitch pattern.

 

If you’re feeling super “festive” this season, the entire set of Merry Snarkmas cross stitch patterns can be purchased for a 25% discount from the individual pattern prices. 

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Deck the Halls cross stitch pattern
Deck the Halls cross stitch pattern
Deck the Halls Cross Stitch Pattern

Don’t get your stockings in a twist, lose your cool and make your family have to use their new gift cards for bail money. Deck the halls and not your family with this cheeky cross stitch pattern.

 

If you’re feeling super “cheery” this season, the entire set of Merry Snarkmas cross stitch patterns can be purchased for a 25% discount from the individual pattern prices. 

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Delicate Flower cross stitch pattern
Delicate Flower cross stitch pattern
Delicate Flower Cross Stitch Pattern

Have you had it with people telling you to act like a lady, or act in a way that is more to their taste? The Delicate Flower cross stitch pattern is a bold design to empower yourself to feel feminine and strong. The very “direct” phrase featured on this pattern contrasts with the lovely feminine rose wreath encircling it, making it perfect for the snarky woman who knows she’s fabulous. Vibrant rich reds and purples pair beautifully with deep teals, and add an elegant burst of colour to your decor. The purple Kreinik thread has a tiny bit of sparkle in it, creating a delicate shimmer to the text and wreath stems. This pattern can also be stitched without the text, the wreath is very pretty just on its own. If you want to stand in your feminine power and declare to the world that you are unstoppable, the Delicate Flower cross stitch pattern might just be the perfect addition to your decor.

 

This pattern is also available in the Go Bloom Yourself cross stitch pattern set, and the Go Bloom Yourself collection pattern set (the full collection).

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F*cks Given Today cross stitch pattern
F*cks Given Today cross stitch pattern
F*cks Given Today Cross Stitch Pattern

In case you’re feeling super sassy and your GAFF (give a f*ck factor) is at zero, then the F*cks Given Today cross stitch pattern might be right up your alley. Featuring a delectable donut with orange icing and scrumptious-looking blue sprinkles, this pattern is a great way to stitch up your sass. If you’d like to adjust the text in the pattern to suit your taste, check out the custom pattern option.

 

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Fa La La Wine cross stitch pattern
Fa La La Wine cross stitch pattern
Fa La La Wine Cross Stitch Pattern

Open up that box of wine and let’s make Christmas Carols fun again. “Tis the season to be boozy…” “Later on, we’ll perspire, as we drink by the fire…” Get into the spirit of the season with the Fa La La Wine cross stitch pattern.

 

If you’re feeling super “cheery” this season, the entire set of Merry Snarkmas cross stitch patterns can be purchased for a 25% discount from the individual pattern prices. 

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Fresh Out of Fuchsias hand embroidery pattern
Fresh Out of Fuchsias hand embroidery pattern
Fresh Out of Fuchsias Hand Embroidery Pattern

Are you one of those people who likes to push boundaries just a little, seeing what you can get away with? If so, the Fresh Out of Fuchsias hand embroidery pattern might be perfect for you. This sassy phrase is ideal for displaying at the office without being criticized by your boss, or hanging at home even if you’re careful with what “language” is seen and heard around the family. The gorgeous luscious colours give your decor a burst of vibrant energy, and the delicate foliage mixed with bold roses creates a lovely texture that is really fun to stitch. This pattern can even be stitched without the text, it’s a gorgeous floral wreath just on its own. Get your cheeky groove on with the pretty florals of the Fresh Out of Fuchsias embroidery pattern.

 

This pattern is also available in the Go Bloom Yourself hand embroidery pattern set, and the Go Bloom Yourself collection pattern set (the full collection).

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Garden Hoes hand embroidery pattern
Garden Hoes hand embroidery pattern
Garden Hoes Hand Embroidery Pattern

Are you one of those people who love sarcasm and quick-witted comebacks? If so, the Garden Hoes hand embroidery pattern might be an ideal addition to your home. This very cheeky phrase is guaranteed to make all who read it spit out their coffee (or wine) and entertain you every time you read it. This pattern uses only four stitches, so it’s absolutely perfect for beginner embroiderers. This wreath can also be stitched without the text, just in case you’d like to give it as a gift but you’re not sure of the recipient’s sense of humour. The three tones of green and teal contrasted by vibrant red and orange complements any decor, bringing a little of the outside indoors. Aspire to snarky greatness with the Garden Hoes embroidery pattern.

 

This pattern is also available in the Go Bloom Yourself hand embroidery pattern set, and the Go Bloom Yourself collection pattern set (the full collection).

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Go Bloom Yourself cross stitch hand embroidery pattern set
Zero Fronds Given cross stitch pattern
Go Bloom Yourself Collection Pattern Set

Just can’t make up your mind which patterns to get first? The Go Bloom Yourself collection pattern set will help you with that! Featuring all ten cross stitch and hand embroidery patterns in the collection, this set is perfect if you’re wanting to stitch up gifts for loved ones, or just decorate your home with a blend of snark and sweetness. Patterns included are the hand embroidery patterns Let Love Bloom, Garden Hoes, Let Your Dreams Blossom and Fresh Out of Fuchsias, as well as the cross stitch patterns Zero Fronds Given, Sit on a Thorn, Life is a Garden, Delicate Flower, Go Pollinate Yourself and Be Blooming Fabulous. Purchasing this pattern set also saves you $20 over buying the individual patterns. There are stitching tutorials for the hand embroidery stitches featured, so even beginners can feel comfortable they’ll be able to tackle any of these patterns. Stitch up a snarky and sweet storm with the Go Bloom Yourself collection pattern set.

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Go Bloom Yourself cross stitch pattern set
Sit on a Thorn cross stitch pattern
Go Bloom Yourself Cross Stitch Pattern Set

Stitch up a storm with the Go Bloom Yourself cross stitch pattern set. Featuring all six cross stitch patterns from the Go Bloom Yourself collection, this fun mix of sweet and snarky has a little something for everyone. The patterns included are Zero Fronds Given, Sit on a Thorn, Life is a Garden, Delicate Flower, Go Pollinate Yourself and Be Blooming Fabulous. Two of the patterns also use optional embroidered roses, and a tutorial for that stitch is included in the patterns. Also by purchasing this set, you’re saving $15 over the price of buying these patterns individually. Whether you’re stitching for your home or office, or that perfect “special” gift, this cross stitch pattern set has something for all occasions.

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